ayunemo — もらったレビュー

元の翻訳
For the details of the event, check out the new special site:
http://one-piece-15th-utage.com/

修正後
For the details of the event, check out the redesigned special site:
http://one-piece-15th-utage.com/

元の翻訳
Thank you for your phone call yesterday. It was already past 9:30 at night and I left the office already. I could not start my computer so I asked you to send me an email.
I am not good at English so I am unable to comprehend what you speak. It is probably better to communicate by emails to be certain about the business.
Of course it is no problem to talk on the phone but it helps me if you send me an email afterward to confirm what we discussed on the phone.
I hope I'm not causing you inconveniences.
Thank you.

修正後
Thank you for your phone call yesterday. It was already past 21:30 at night and I left the office then. I could not activate my PC so asked you to send me an email.
I am not good at English so unable to comprehend what you speak. It is probably better to communicate by emails to be certain about the business.
Of course it is no problem to talk on the phone but it helps me if you could send me an email afterward to confirm what we discussed on the phone.
I hope I'm not causing you inconveniences.
Thank you.

元の翻訳
I am sorry.
There was an error in the description of the auction.
I will refund you $10. Could you forgive me?

修正後
I am sorry.
There was an error in the description of the item.
I will refund you $10. Could you kindly accept my offer?

元の翻訳
上海オフィスのmessers様（CC:6pm Ltdの池田さん、Life Design Ltdの鈴木さん）
先日、モデルナンバー200001と200003（弊社セメントモデルナンバーC250）のメタルスタンド追加の件について弊社Pennyとお話し頂いたと思います。その節は有難うございました。
最終コメントは以下の通りです。
1.　残念ながら、以下の理由により、メタルスタンドの追加はできません。
-　メタルスタンドを別途発送してほしいとのことですが、残念ながら、穴の大小を問わず、現在のブラックバックケースにはこのメタルスタンドを嵌め込むことはできません。

修正後
上海オフィスのmessers様（CC:6pm社の池田さん、Life Design社の鈴木さん）
先日、御社のモデルナンバー200001と200003（弊社セメントモデルナンバーC250）へのメタルスタンド追加の件につきまして私の同僚Pennyと電話でお話し頂き、有難うございました。
最終的なコメントを以下の通りさせていただきます。
1.　残念ながら、以下の理由により、すでに発送している商品にメタルスタンドを追加することはできません。
-　ご指摘のとおり大小を問わず、別送を希望されている現ブラックバックケースにある穴にはこのメタルスタンドを嵌め込むことはできません。

元の翻訳
5. When we can expect effects of improvements
August 1, 2014

6. Store name improvement plans are implemented

We developed the improvement plans as mentioned above.↵
By implementing these improvement plans, we will improve our sales service.↵
We strongly desire to sell our products on Amazon and ask for your permission to sell our products on Amazon.
We appreciate for your consideration.

Thank you for your time.
Yours sincerely,

**********
Representative

修正後
5. Expect date for the improvement plan takes effect
August 1, 2014

↵
6. Name of the shop for adopting the improvement plan
*********↵

↵
We have created the above mentioned improvement plan↵
From now on, we are going to strive for improving the selling service by adopting the above mentioned improvement plan.↵
I strongly hope that you would be able to reinstate our selling privilege.
We appreciate for your consideration.

↵
↵
I am sorry for taking your time on this matter in your busy schedule.
I would appreciate if you could review our improvement plan.


************↵
Managing Director↵