Dewi Panggabean (dpangga) — もらったレビュー

元の翻訳
Because I'm not a native in English, I can't understand very well, can you sign in to the sites such as Google, Yahoo, YouTube or iTunes?
Or is it difficult to sign in on a particular site by yourself?

修正後
Because I'm not a native in English, I can't understand very well, but could a website such as Google, Yahoo, YouTube or iTunes, etch be added?
Or is it quite difficult add a particular website by myself?

元の翻訳
Thank you for delivery.
We are now in negotiation on sending the towel you brought here.
Therefore, tomorrow is 5 November, is it meet the deadline if we order on 6 November?

I will transfer amount of money for September payment.
Please make sure that there won't be any mistake.

Please send me the stock data in the early month as you promised .
This is very important.

Then, could you please send again the image of all the product in the price list (order form) that you tell me last day?

修正後
Thank you for telling me the delivery date.
We have sent the towel we had and now are in negotiation for the deal.
Does it meet the deadline if we order tomorrow November 5 or 6?

I will transfer amount of money for September payment.
Please make sure that there won't be any mistake.

Please send me the stock data in the early month as you promised .
This is very important.

In addition, could you please send price list (order form) of all the product below that I told you before and all images you have?

元の翻訳
I have received the description in detail, and I'm thinking of delivering the satisfactory goods to tou.
Recently, I displayed product on ebay separately, it is 4 Tamahagane (knife).
Because there is the link of photo below, please tell me the Tamahagane you want.
And inside, the high quality is number 3.
Last time, because the tracking number was not attached on the Tamahagane, please return it by general air mail.
Since I want to have a good deal in the future, I will pay the round-trip shipping.
About the difference of change of goods, I will inform you again about the calculation.

修正後
I have received the description in detail, and I'm thinking of delivering the satisfactory goods to tou.
Recently, I displayed product on ebay separately, it is 4 Tamahagane (knife).
Because there is the link of photo below, please tell me the Tamahagane you want.
And among them, number 3 is of high quality.
Because the tracking number was not attached on the Tamahagane I sent you last time, please return it by general air mail.
Since I want to have a good deal in the future, I will pay the round-trip shipping.
About the difference of change of goods, I will inform you again about the calculation.

元の翻訳
I have received the description in detail, and I'm thinking of delivering the satisfactory goods to tou.
Recently, I displayed product on ebay separately, it is 4 Tamahagane (knife).
Because there is the link of photo below, please tell me the Tamahagane you want.
And inside, the high quality is number 3.
Last time, because the tracking number was not attached on the Tamahagane, please return it by general air mail.
Since I want to have a good deal in the future, I will pay the round-trip shipping.
About the difference of change of goods, I will inform you again about the calculation.↵

修正後
I have received the description in detail, and I'm thinking of delivering the satisfactory goods to you.
Now I have 4 Tamahagane (knife material) in addition to what I displayed on ebay.
There is the link of photo below. Please tell me the Tamahagane you want.
Among them, No. 3 has the highest quality.
Please return the Tamahagane I sent last time by general air mail without a tracking number.
Since I want to have a good business with you in the future, I will pay the round-trip shipping.
About the difference of change of goods, I will inform you again about the calculation.

元の翻訳
Thank you for offering me the K10U!
It will be useful this time.
But we haven't received the K10U yet.
I'm also responsible in the NIJ of Product Specialist, because I'm waiting for the support for the artist who didn't bring the K10U, I'm so happy if you could reply as soon as possible.
Then I need an offering of KKS49, can we make a request here?
KKS49 is only for me.

It's possible to complete the work during Wednesday.

修正後
Thank you for offering me the K10U!
It will be useful for us in future.
But we haven't received the K10U yet.
I'm also responsible for the NIJ of Product Specialist, because I'm waiting for the support for the artist who didn't bring the K10U, I'm so happy if you could reply us as soon as possible.
Then I need an offering of KKS49, can we make a request here?
KKS49 is only for me.

It's possible to complete the work during Wednesday.

元の翻訳
I'm so sorry for being late in related to work. I'd like to return the grill, but I lost the shipping office label, so I don't know your address. I know it's troubling you, but please reply me with the destination of return.

修正後
I'm so sorry for being late to get back to you because I was busy at work. I'd like to return the grill, but I lost the shipping label, so I don't know your address. I am sorry for troubling you, but please reply to me with the destination of return.

元の翻訳
We are not purchasing at ebay, can we do direct purchasing from you?
By passing e-bay, we don't have to pay handling fee of sales.
Therefore, could we get 25% off on purchasing from the price list which is $165?

We have a lot of sales destination in Japan.
If we can do the business with you, I think you will get the benefit.

I think that's the reason why your number of sales certainly increased in this couple months.

If you could purchase directly from the maker, number of purchasing is increased, so we could get more discount.

修正後
We are not purchasing at eBay [mistranslation], [comma splice] can we directly purchase from you?
Bypassing eBay, you don't have to pay handling fees.
Therefore, could we get 25% off on the listed price, which is $165?

We have a lot of sales destinations in Japan.
If we can do the business with you, I think you will get the benefit [awkward].

I think that's the reason why your number of sales certainly increased in this couple months [mistranslation].

If you could purchase directly from the maker [word choice], number of purchasing is increased [passive voice?], so we could get more discount [different from the original].

元の翻訳
This time I ask the shipping to the office.
But, from now on you cannot do the custom clearence procedure by yourself

Until now I have never done the costume clearence procedur, not even once
So I ask for the custom clearence agency to help me

The price is so expensive

Depending on company, I asked to make the total shipping cost cheaper, it seems like the result of the price is becoming 1.5 times cheaper.

So sad though there was a product I want immadiately

Furthermor, the invoice was not attached on the custom clearance

Please send in PDF immadiately

Then, refund my overpaid money.

修正後
This time I ask [tense confusion] the shipping [unclear] to the office.
But, from now on you cannot do the custom clearence [spelling] procedure by yourself

Until now I have never done the costume clearence procedur [spelling], not even once
So I ask for the custom clearence [spelling] agency to help me.

The price is so expensive.

Depending on [article] company, I asked to make the total shipping cost cheaper. It seems like the result of the price is becoming 1.5 times cheaper.

So sad though there was a product I want immadiately [spelling].

Furthermor [spelling], the invoice was not attached on the custom clearance

Please send in PDF immadiately [spelling].

Then, refund my overpaid money.

元の翻訳
Thank you for you purchase this time.
Due to the lack of confirmation, I forgot to ship the product by registered mail.
Because I sent it by reguler shipment, I repay you the registered mail fee of $5.
By any chance, if any condition occurs in the shipment of product such as lost, we will take a responsibility of it.
I'm so sorry for this inconvenience.
Thank you very much

修正後
Thank you for you purchase this time.
Due to my oversight, I forgot to ship the product by registered mail.
Because I sent it by reguler [spelling] shipment, I repay you the registered mail fee of $5.
By any chance [usage issue], if any condition occurs in the shipment of product such as lost, we [plural] will take a responsibility of [wrong proposition] it.
I'm so sorry for this inconvenience.
Thank you very much.

元の翻訳
A. I sent you the unused good. I opened the seal in order to check it and left the content just like it. Is something missing? If you don't mind, please send the image of goods.
B. I want 10 goods of this item, can I get a little discount?
C. Can you make the list? Can you issue the coupon code?
D. I want 10 goods of this item, is there any available stock? Then, can you give me a little discount?
E. Thank you for giving me discount!

修正後
A. I sent you the unused good [wrong usage]. I opened the seal in order to check it and left the content just like it [unnatural]. Is something missing? If you don't mind, please send an image of [article] goods.
B. I want 10 goods [word choice] of this item, [comma splice] can I get a little discount?
C. Could you make the list? Can you issue a coupon code?
D. I want 10 goods [word choice] of this item, [comma splice] is there any available stock? Then, can you give me a little discount?
E. Thank you for giving me [article] discount!

元の翻訳
First of all, as a representative of A Company, we are very sorry that we cannot deliver the satisfaction goods to costumers. With all Japanese pride, all our company can do is trying hard to respond.
Is the product has been returned to United States? If the product has not been returned, is it possible to send it back to Japan? We will do the maintenance in the workshop, we will extend the diameter inside into 220 mm. We will contact you by tomorrow morning for confirming the cost.

修正後
First of all, as a representative of A Company, I'm very sorry that we cannot deliver the satisfactory goods to you. With all Japanese pride, all our company can do is trying hard to respond.
Is the product has been returned to United States? If the product has not been returned, is it possible to send it back to Japan? We will do the maintenance in the workshop, we will extend the diameter inside into 220 mm. We will contact you by tomorrow morning for confirming the cost.

元の翻訳
The goods were safely arrived. Thank you very much.
But the price of Commercial Invoice on the delivery was not accurate.
Since the file is uploaded, please check.
In addition, "Please fill the exact price of Commercial Invoice" and tell the person in charge of shipping in Taiwan

修正後
The goods were safely arrived [why passive voice?]. Thank you very much.
But the price of [article missing] Commercial Invoice on the delivery [unnatural] was not accurate.
Since the file is uploaded [tense confusion, use active voice], please check [object missing].
In addition, "Please fill the exact price of Commercial Invoice" and tell the person in charge of shipping in Taiwan [extremely awkward].

元の翻訳
The goods were safely arrived. Thank you very much.
But the price of Commercial Invoice on the delivery was not accurate.
Since the file is uploaded, please check.
In addition, "Please fill the exact price of Commercial Invoice" and tell the person in charge of shipping in Taiwan

修正後
The goods were safely arrived. Thank you very much.
But the price of the Commercial Invoice attached at shipment was not accurate.
I upload the file, so please check.
In addition, please remind the person in charge of shipping in Taiwan to "fill the correct price of the Commercial Invoice" from now on.