翻訳者レビュー ( 日本語 → 英語 )

評価: 52 / ネイティブ 日本語 / 3 Reviews / 2014/07/28 23:43:50

mirror1000
mirror1000 52 初めまして、翻訳の勉強をしながら、お仕事させて頂きたいと思っています。
日本語

お待ちいただきありがとうございます。
メーカーに発注しました所、発売日が延期されていました。
発売予定日は2014年8月29日です。

元々が6月の発売予定だったので、すでに発売されていると勘違いしていました。
申し訳ございません。

このままお待ちいただくかキャンセルするかお選びください。
よろしくお願いします。

英語

Thank you for your patience.
As we confirmed the order with the maker, it turned out the sales date has been postponed.
The release date is August 29, 2014.

There was a misunderstanding on our side that it was supposed to be released in June, so it has already been sold in the market.
We sincerely apologize for the confusion.

Kindly please choose whether you will wait, or cancel the order.
Thank you for your understanding.

レビュー ( 3 )

tearz 50 翻訳経験豊富です。 過去の実績や評価などご確認ください。 ご連絡お待ち...
tearzはこの翻訳結果を"★★★"と評価しました 2014/07/30 00:59:02

元の翻訳
Thank you for your patience.
As we confirmed the order with the maker, it turned out the sales date has been postponed.
The release date is August 29, 2014.

There was a misunderstanding on our side that it was supposed to be released in June, so it has already been sold in the market.
We sincerely apologize for the confusion.

Kindly please choose whether you will wait, or cancel the order.
Thank you for your understanding.

修正後
Thank you for your patience.
As we confirmed the order with the manufacturer, it turned out the sales date has been postponed.
The revised release date is August 29, 2014.

There was a misunderstanding on our side that it was supposed to be released in June, so it has already been sold in the market.
We sincerely apologize for the confusion.

Please kindly choose whether you wish to wait, or cancel the order.
Thank you for your understanding.

センスの良さを感じます。2、3修正させて頂きましたが、あとは「元々が6月の発売予定だったので、すでに発売されていると勘違いしていました。」の一文をもう少しわかりやすくされるといいと思います。

このレビューを100%の人が「適切であった」と回答しています。

mirror1000 mirror1000 2014/07/30 06:09:03

レビューありがとうございます。

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chee_madam 52 留学、就労と英語圏で15年生活してまいりました。実務翻訳に従事しています。...
chee_madamはこの翻訳結果を"★★★"と評価しました 2014/07/30 01:10:51

元の翻訳
Thank you for your patience.
As we confirmed the order with the maker, it turned out the sales date has been postponed.
The release date is August 29, 2014.

There was a misunderstanding on our side that it was supposed to be released in June, so it has already been sold in the market.
We sincerely apologize for the confusion.

Kindly please choose whether you will wait, or cancel the order.
Thank you for your understanding.

修正後
Thank you for your patience.
As we confirmed the order with the manufacturer, it turned out the release date has been postponed.
The release date is August 29, 2014.

There was a misunderstanding on our end that it was supposed to be released in June, so it has already been sold in the market.
We sincerely apologize for the confusion.

Kindly please choose whether you will wait, or cancel the order.
Thank you for your understanding.

このレビューを100%の人が「適切であった」と回答しています。

mirror1000 mirror1000 2014/07/30 06:08:54

レビューありがとうございます。

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ryojiyono 52 英検1級。 TOEFL623。 TOEIC 975。
ryojiyonoはこの翻訳結果を"★★★"と評価しました 2014/07/30 09:41:56

元の翻訳
Thank you for your patience.
As we confirmed the order with the maker, it turned out the sales date has been postponed.
The release date is August 29, 2014.

There was a misunderstanding on our side that it was supposed to be released in June, so it has already been sold in the market.
We sincerely apologize for the confusion.

Kindly please choose whether you will wait, or cancel the order.
Thank you for your understanding.

修正後
Thank you for your patience.
As we confirmed the order with the maker, it turned out the sales date has been postponed.
The release date is August 29, 2014.

There was a misunderstanding on our side that it has already been released because it was originally scheduled in June.
We sincerely apologize for the confusion.

Kindly please choose whether you will wait, or cancel the order.
Thank you for your understanding.

日本語原文から6月発売予定であったことは事実のようなので、英文中6月発売予定が誤解であったような表記になっていた部分を修正させていただきました。

このレビューを100%の人が「適切であった」と回答しています。

mirror1000 mirror1000 2014/07/30 09:53:26

レビューありがとうございます!確かにその方がすっきりと分かりやすいと実感しました。今後の参考にさせて頂きます。

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