翻訳者レビュー ( 日本語 → 英語 )

日本語

御社の商品購入について質問です。

私は御社の商品に魅力を感じ、是非日本で販売店として広めていきたいと考えています。

販売方法としては、専門のネットショップを作成したり、アマゾンなどのプラットフォームでの販売を考えています。

２つ質問があります。

１．日本への発送は可能ですか？

２．商品の卸し価格は何％ですか？

支払い方法はPaypalを使います。

私のPaypalアドレスは◯◯です。

良い返事をお待ちしてます。

英語

I have a question about acquiring your company's products.

I think the products of your company are attractive, and I would appreciate to expand them as a sales outlet in Japan.

As sales method, I'm thinking of creating a specialized online shop, or selling on platforms such as Amazon.
I have 2 questions.
1. Can you ship the products to Japan?
2. What is the percent for wholesale price of the product?

For payment method, I'm thinking of using Paypal.
My Paypal Address is ◯◯.
I'm waiting for a good response.

レビュー ( 2 )

aspenxはこの翻訳結果を"★★★★"と評価しました 2013/11/26 11:16:19

元の翻訳
I have a question about acquiring your company's products.

I think the products of your company are attractive, and I would appreciate to expand them as a sales outlet in Japan.

As sales method, I'm thinking of creating a specialized online shop, or selling on platforms such as Amazon.
I have 2 questions.
1. Can you ship the products to Japan?
2. What is the percent for wholesale price of the product?

For payment method, I'm thinking of using Paypal.
My Paypal Address is ◯◯.
I'm waiting for a good response.

修正後
I have a question about your company's products.

I think your company's products are attractive, and I would like to expand your reach by opening a sales outlet in Japan.

As a mode of sales, I'm thinking of creating a specialized online shop, or selling on platforms such as Amazon.
I have 2 questions.
1. Can you ship the products to Japan?
2. What is the percentage discount for wholesale price of the product?

For payment method, I'm thinking of using PayPal.
My PayPal Address is ◯◯.
I look forward to a favorable response.

linne0213はこの翻訳結果を"★★★★"と評価しました 2014/02/04 21:30:22

元の翻訳
I have a question about acquiring your company's products.

I think the products of your company are attractive, and I would appreciate to expand them as a sales outlet in Japan.

As sales method, I'm thinking of creating a specialized online shop, or selling on platforms such as Amazon.
I have 2 questions.
1. Can you ship the products to Japan?
2. What is the percent for wholesale price of the product?

For payment method, I'm thinking of using Paypal.
My Paypal Address is ◯◯.
I'm waiting for a good response.

修正後
I have a question about purchasing your company's products.

I think the products of your company are attractive, and I would appreciate if we are allowed to expand their sales as a sales outlet in Japan.

As sales method, I'm thinking of creating a specialized online shop, or selling on platforms such as Amazon.
I have 2 questions.
1. Will you ship the products to Japan?
2. How much is the wholesale price of the product in margin percentage?

For payment method, I'm hoping to use Paypal.
My Paypal Address is ◯◯.
I'm hoping for a positive response.

全体的に、英語的な問題はほとんど見られませんが、翻訳として考えると言葉の選択が惜しいです。
acquire と purchase の定義の違い、hoping と waiting, good と positive のニュアンスの違いなど
辞書を引いて考えてみてください。
（私が担当者だったら、I'm waiting for a good response. と言われたら、なんて高圧的な！と
取引が嫌になってしまうかもしれません。お客様の利益を損ねないような気遣いができれば、
「英語ができる人」から「翻訳者」にもう1歩近づくと思います）