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[Translation from Japanese to English ] My body, having a youthful womb, especially easily had side effects to the me...

kamitoki Translated by kamitoki scintillar Translated by scintillar
It's kind of sudden but I'd like to borrow this opportunity to announce something.
We, husband and wife, started trying to get pregnant exactly a year before.
To start getting pregnant we both husband and wife got examined at the hospital to see whether there was no problem with either one of our bodies.
They found nothing wrong on my part, but they found male infertility for his.
Because his case is special and there is no cure so far, the only method to treat this was to use a drug with strong side effects on the feminine part of his body to artificially assist conception. My body, having a youthful womb, especially easily had side effects to the medical treatment, among them things which went hand in hand with pain which made me scream out, and because there was an excess imbalance of female hormones, my physical condition rapidly got worse and I became mentally unstable.
Because of that sort of stress, chronic diseases returned, and I fell into a situation where I had to receive dialysis treatment, spending my life in hospital.
Finally I couldn't even produce my voice, and contact with friends, relatives and acquaintances was completely cut off, I couldn't even go outside on my own, and I was cornered to one step this side of suicide. He continued to support me like that, and I spent every day in great pain, blaming myself. I had so much emotional instability which I vented on him, but he didn't lose his composure even once.
He prioritized taking care of my body and spirit, always piling on endurance on top of endurance, having tenderness and affection,
What I hoped for was that he would afford me brushing away any kind of scapegoating, and if I was even able to smile a little, he would curtail me by all means.
When he had a holiday from his work, the two of us went far away, distanced ourselves from the noise of the city, and just spending time in nature became our sole relaxation.
We discussed things many times, temporarily ceased trying to have a baby, and decided to start again from the following year.
During that period of several months off, we reflected on things calmly, and returned to our original way of thinking.
Even up to this point, we didn't try to stop ourselves from having a baby, and maybe this was related to the serious problem of declining birthrates in Japan. When we get married we should have a baby, even though having a baby is natural after marriage, we feel that the pressure put on the wife when there is ill will from around about for not having children would put our hopes into disarray.
And then, speaking of infertility, due to the groundless prejudices that it's a problem from the woman's point of view, I think there would be an especially obstinate guard around my heart. From next year when we start the step up medical treatment as we planned, even considering the age of my womb and the number of eggs, conception should have been easy and the doctor gave that sort of diagnosis. However, we decided to choose a life that didn't particularly created more children. "It doesn't mean that we got married because we couldn't have children. It doesn't mean that we desired a normal life which everyone could envy. However, the two of us are very happy together, and feel at ease in our hearts, and very happy, and because we love each other from the bottom of our hearts, we only wanted to be together. For that, the existence of a child wasn't necessary by nature."
Certainly, if we could be awarded a child that had our genes, we think that would be a very fortunate thing.
We eagerly look forward greatly to holding our baby in our arms, that isn't a lie. However, the two of us considered our many troubles, and then became calm, and the way of life that seemed essential for us, the result which sought the way things should be for a true happiness for the two of us. From now on we opted not to particularly make children, but determined that the two of us remain married for life.
From now on, because we cannot have children, and because the two of us can jump strongly as individuals, we think we'll be happy and build up a funky life which people watching can enjoy as well.

Without adding parentheses, the truth is, we feel we will happily live appropriately for ourselves, freely, with smiling faces. And then the life of the two of us just as a married couple with no children is overflowing with so much love, and we feel we'd like to verify that we have ourselves an enhancement of our happiness.
"For sure God has bestowed on us a particular mission because we are unable to have children, not a life which raises children and leaves behind offspring."
Believing this, we are really positive and have a cheerful feeling, we could miraculously choose this fortunate decision together at the same time.
For us, this understanding of this decision was from inside our gut, and we were able to accept each other with a feeling of great fortune, without any kind of hesitation. We now have a very excited feeling, and we can't help but look forward to life from now on.
This year was a very difficult year, but the bonds between the two of us were all the more strengthened, we learned many things, and it became a great year for growth.
As things are now, we are grateful from our heart to God who bestowed this sort of chance on us.
This composition stops before the eyes of people who suffer the same sort of troubles, and we hope it alleviates the harsh feeling even a little bit.
In addition, we'd be happy if it provides a chance of having new choices and aspirations.
And then unsure words corner and hurt people bearing the problem of infertility so much, and people around you and especially Japanese people want to know the serious reality of Japan, where many people who fall into a dilemma in their lives because of this.
So as not to be hurt by uncertain words from around me from now on, in order to protect my wife, I am deeply grateful and respect, with feelings of pride from my heart, that boldness and bravery which agreed to make a dignified proclamation of the delicate condition of my body like this.
User's Request Text


私が望む事はどんな犠牲を払っても与えてくれましたし、私が少しでも笑顔になれる為なら自分の身を削ってなんでもしてくれました。 彼の仕事が休みの時に二人で遠出をし、都会の喧騒から離れ、自然の中で過ごす事だけが私達の唯一の息抜きとなっていました。
ここまでなっても私達が妊活自体をやめようとしなかったのは、日本の深刻な少子化問題と関わりがあるのかもしれません。 結婚したら子供を産むべき、産むのが当たり前結婚しても子供がいない夫婦への周りの悪意のない圧力などが私達の考えを狂わせていたように感じます。
そして不妊症と言えば女性側に問題があるというような根拠のない偏見により、私の心を特に意固地にさせていた面があると思います。来年から予定通りステップアップした治療をスタートすれば私の子宮年齢や卵の数から考えても、妊娠する事は容易だったはずですし医者からもそう診断されています。ただ、あえて私達はもう子供を作らない人生を選択する事を決断しました。 『私達は子供が欲しいから結婚した訳ではない。 私達は皆が羨む普通の人生を望んでいた訳ではない。 ただ2人で一緒にいる事がとても楽しくて、心安らいで、とても幸せで、お互いを心の底から愛しているから、一緒にいたかっただけの事。 そこにもともと子供という存在は必要なかった。』
2人の赤ちゃんをこの腕で抱く事をどれだけ楽しみに待ち望んでいたか、それは嘘ではありません。 ただ、2人で沢山悩み考えた末、そして冷静になって、本来の私達らしい生き方、2人にとっての本当の幸せの在り方を追求していった結果、私達は今後、あえて、子供は作らず、2人で人生を添い遂げようという決断を選択しました。

かっこはつけず、ありのままに、私達らしく、自由に、笑顔で、楽しく生きていこうと思います。 そして、子供を持たない2人きりの夫婦の人生がどれだけ愛に溢れ、幸せで充実しているものなのかを、身を持って証明していきたいと思います。
この決断は私達にとって1番腑に落ちる納得のいくもので何の迷いも感じる事なくお互いとても幸せな気持ちで受け入れる事ができました。 私達は今とてもワクワクした気持ちで、これからの人生が楽しみで仕方ありません。

又、新しい選択や希望を持つきっかけになってくれれば嬉しいです。 そして心許ない言葉がどれだけ不妊の問題を抱えている人を傷つけ追い詰めているか、それによって自ら命を落とす人も沢山いるという深刻な日本の現実を、周囲の人、特に日本の人に知ってほしいです。

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JLPT Level 2 passer
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Translated various Japanese-English documents (culture, tourism, financial, manga)
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I have the Japanese Language Proficiency Test Level 2 and completed a one-year Japanese Language Program at Waseda University, Tokyo. I also have a...

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