翻訳者レビュー ( 日本語 → 英語 )

日本語

ph51321

街を覆う戦火と混乱と容赦ない死の中で、民間人の少年 シーブック・アノーは襲撃から避難するために、友人達とともにコロニーを脱出するが、同行していた内の一人 セシリー・フェアチャイルドはC・Vに連れ去られてしまう。セシリーの素顔は「コスモ貴族主義」を掲げたマイッツァー・ロナの生き別れの孫娘ベラ・ロナだった。 シーブック達は近隣のコロニー「フロンティアI」に辿り着き、地球連邦軍の宇宙練習艦スペース・アークに保護される。

英語

ph51321

Amid the war, anarchy, and merciless deaths, a civilian, Seabook Arno, escapes from the colony with his friends to avoid attacks. However, Cecily Fairchild, one of Arno's party, gets abducted by C・V. Cecily turns out to be Meitzer Ronah's separated granddaughter, Berah Ronah. Meitzer Ronah is the establisher of "Post Aristocratism." Seabook and his party reach a nearby colony "Frontier Ⅰ," where they are taken into protective custody by Space Ark, a training ship, of Earth Federation Force.

レビュー ( 1 )

kpanzerはこの翻訳結果を"★★★★★"と評価しました 2014/02/28 22:41:32

元の翻訳
ph51321

Amid the war, anarchy, and merciless deaths, a civilian, Seabook Arno, escapes from the colony with his friends to avoid attacks. However, Cecily Fairchild, one of Arno's party, gets abducted by C・V. Cecily turns out to be Meitzer Ronah's separated granddaughter, Berah Ronah. Meitzer Ronah is the establisher of "Post Aristocratism." Seabook and his party reach a nearby colony "Frontier Ⅰ," where they are taken into protective custody by Space Ark, a training ship, of Earth Federation Force.

修正後
ph51321

Amid the war, anarchy, and merciless deaths, a young civilian, Seabook Arno, escapes from the colony with his friends to avoid attacks. However, Cecily Fairchild, one of Arno's party, gets abducted by C・V. Cecily turns out to be Meitzer Ronah's separated granddaughter, Berah Ronah. Meitzer Ronah is the establisher of "Post Aristocratism." Seabook and his party reach a nearby colony "Frontier Ⅰ," where they are taken into protective custody by Space Ark, a training ship, of Earth Federation Force.

The 少年 part might be better expressed by adding "young" into the text.
Great job!

[mrsk]

Thanks for the feedback! Yes, "young" was indeed necessary. I will do more proof reading next time! Thank you!