Thus in short he settled to live-feeding all on the sense that he once had lived, and dependent on it not alone for a support but for an identity.32.
But the realizations increased.
No passion had ever touched him, for this was what passion meant; he had survived and maundered and pined, but where had been his deep ravage? ... He had seen outside of his life, not learned it from within, the way a woman was mourned when she had been loved for herself…. Now that the illumination had begun, however, it blazed to the zenith, and what he presently stood there gazing at was the sounded void of his life.
このように、短く言えば、サポートのためだけでなく、独自性のために、生きること－彼がかつて生きた、頼った感覚のすべてを養うことを決めた。３２。
しかし、認識は増大した。
彼が情熱的になることはなかった、このための情熱とは何を意味したのか：彼は生き伸び、不明瞭に話し、切望したが、彼の深い荒廃はどこに行ったのか？…彼は、人生の内側から学ぶのではなく、彼の人生の外側を見た。女性がが自分自身を愛したとき、彼女が哀悼された方法…
今、解明が始まった、しかしながら、それは頂点へと切り開かれ、彼がそこに立ち現在凝視しているのは、鳴り響く彼の人生の空虚さであった。
