翻訳者レビュー ( 日本語 → 英語 )

備考: 体験談

日本語

細かな気遣いが嬉しかったです。ガイドがとっても上手でした。俥夫さんの笑顔に癒され、引き締まった身体に見とれっぱなしでした。目の保養☆
オバサンになっての京都は娘の頃には感じなかった感動でいっぱいでした。

英語

I was so happy about his kind consideration. He was very good at guiding. A rickshaw man’s simile comforted me. His strongly built body attracted me all the time. Feast for the eyes☆ Now I’m a middle-aged woman, and yet my heart was full of joy about Kyoto which I had never experienced when I was young.

レビュー ( 1 )

tearzはこの翻訳結果を"★★★★★"と評価しました 2014/10/22 13:50:05

元の翻訳
I was so happy about his kind consideration. He was very good at guiding. A rickshaw man’s simile comforted me. His strongly built body attracted me all the time. Feast for the eyes☆ Now I’m a middle-aged woman, and yet my heart was full of joy about Kyoto which I had never experienced when I was young.

修正後
I was so happy about his kind consideration. He was very good at guiding. A rickshaw man’s simile comforted me. I could not take my eyes off his well-built body the whole time. Feast for the eyes☆ Now I’m a middle-aged woman, and yet my heart was full of joy about Kyoto which I had never experienced in my youth.

良い訳だと思います。添削内容に加筆させて頂いたのはあくまでもご参考までです。　1つ心配なのは☆印です。全角の記号は半角にすると文字化けしてしまうので、☆印のインパクトを損なわずに置き換えられる表現方法があるといいのですが。