翻訳者レビュー ( 日本語 → 英語 )

評価: 56 / ネイティブ 英語 / 1 Review / 2013/06/23 18:05:57

aisucreamsoda
aisucreamsoda 56 I was born and raised in Singapore an...
日本語

この度は、ご迷惑をおかけし、本当に申し訳ございませんでした。

当社の従業員が、あなたのメールを見落として、返信が出来ていなかったようです。

本当にごめんなさい。

新たにこの商品を完璧な梱包状態であなたに送ります。

もちろん、お金は入りません。

今後はこのようなことが起こらないようにします。

ですので、新しい、完璧な梱包の商品が届き次第、フィードバックを変更して頂けないでしょうか?

セラーにとっては切実な問題になりますので、何卒宜しくお願いします。

英語

I sincerely apologise for the inconvenience caused this time.
It seems our company's employees have failed to notice your email, and thus did not reply.
I am very sorry about this.
We will send you this product once more, in perfect packaging.
Of course, we will not charge you for this.
We will ensure that such things do not happen again.
As such, can we please ask that you revise your feedback after you have received your new and perfectly packaged product?
It will become a serious problem for the seller otherwise, we will greatly appreciate if you would please kindly agree to our offer.

レビュー ( 1 )

mura 50 翻訳歴8か月
muraはこの翻訳結果を"★★★★"と評価しました 2013/06/23 20:12:32

元の翻訳
I sincerely apologise for the inconvenience caused this time.
It seems our company's employees have failed to notice your email, and thus did not reply.
I am very sorry about this.
We will send you this product once more, in perfect packaging.
Of course, we will not charge you for this.
We will ensure that such things do not happen again.
As such, can we please ask that you revise your feedback after you have received your new and perfectly packaged product?
It will become a serious problem for the seller otherwise, we will greatly appreciate if you would please kindly agree to our offer.

修正後
I sincerely apologise for the inconvenience (weが必要 他人事のように聞こえる。日本人的発送かもしれませんが) caused this time.
It seems our company's employees have failed to notice your email, and thus did not reply.
I am very sorry about this.
We will send you this product once more, in perfect packaging.
Of course, we will not charge you for this.
We will ensure that such things do not happen again.
As such, can we please ask that you revise your feedback after you (willが必要なのでは、現在完了形ではないので) have received your (ourではないですか) new and perfectly packaged product?
It will become a serious problem for the seller (us sellersではないですか) otherwise, (接続詞がありません)we will greatly appreciate if you would please kindly agree to our offer.

こまかいですが。

aisucreamsoda aisucreamsoda 2013/06/24 12:01:07

添削どうもありがとうございました。勉強になります。一つ質問がありますが、"As such, can we please ask that you revise your feedback after you receive our new and perfectly packaged product?" で宜しいですか。

mura mura 2013/06/24 12:59:29

いいと思いますよ。なにもガチガチに完了形にすることはないと思います。

aisucreamsoda aisucreamsoda 2013/06/24 21:33:18

はい、分かりました。どうもありがとうございます。

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